


The Mapping of Our Heart

by aneggsalot



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: AU, Comfort, Fire, Height difference, M/M, Nightmares, PTSD, Slow Burn, Stars, ThorBruce Week, Touch, cartographer, cartographer thor, i'll add more tags as i add more chapters, thorbruce, zoologist, zoologist bruce
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-21
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-13 19:19:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15371526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aneggsalot/pseuds/aneggsalot
Summary: Thor Odinson is a well respected cartographer who travels part-time to create hand drawn maps for vintage collectors. Bruce Banner is a zoologist who studies animals in hopes of one day learning how to recreate regenerative powers within humans- although most of the time, he just studies species for information. When they meet on a common work trip, an awkward encounter occurs that leaves them wondering if someone could map out a heart- and if so, how similar would theirs be?





	1. Late Night

** **

Thor set down his straightedge, letting out a deep sigh. Long days at work like this only reminded him of how much he missed being with his friends. Back in New York, he usually worked in his office, studying satellite images and photos to be able to transform a piece of paper into a generally accurate map. He was a hard worker, and he never settled for a mediocre product. Winding rivers were a vibrant blue, foliage and forests were stunning greens and land masses seemed extraordinarily inviting with their shades of beige and brown. 

Needless to say, Thor loved what he did. Creating old fashioned maps was a rising career for cartographers as more and more people expressed interest in vintage styles, and he created them well. The only slight problem in his eyes  _ was _ his time spent away from home. Even though it’s exciting to traverse landscapes in Indonesia or Iceland, in order to create a well detailed map on a commission for people within the country, it left with little or no down time. And it was difficult to have cell service or even mail letters.

His work left him lonely most nights. He would look up at the stars, dreaming of where he would go in the future, but secretly hoping that it would lead him home. Where his heart was. 

If he was being specific.. Bruce Banner. 

Throughout their short work together all too many years ago, they created a bond stronger than kevlar rope. It seems odd for a cartographer to team up with a zoologist, but their work went hand in hand. While Thor surveyed land, Bruce looked deeper within habitats and searched for animals of all kinds. They were only together during a short stint in Mali, where Bruce was researching wildcats and wild dogs, but got distracted by bats and hippos and ended up staying for a few extra weeks after the rest of his crew had left. Thor stayed with him to be kind- but also because he wasn’t entirely satisfied with his maps yet. 

Alone, surviving off spare change, and both with passion in their hearts for the world around them, it only made sense that.. Something had happened between them. The rest of their friends- Tony, Rhodey, Sam, Bucky, Steve- questioned what had occured all those years ago, before their group had even managed to join together. But they were met with reluctant laughs and assurances that they finished their work, packed up, and went home. 

Yet on this night, as Thor stood over his lighting table, sketching out a first draft of a map of Tunisia, he remembered what really happened. 

 

_ Bruce made the first move, a small touch to Thor’s thigh, making Thor’s eyes prolong their glance toward him as he asked a simple question that Thor didn’t comprehend until seconds later.  _

_ “Maybe we should call it a night, yeah?” Bruce asked, closing up his notebook filled with animal information.  _

_ Thor blinked a few times as he stared at Bruce, slowly turning to look down at his map of Mali’s plains. He nodded, and looked back to Bruce, who was laughing.  _

_ “Are you okay? You seem a little.. Nervous,” Bruce added, smiling at Thor’s look of slight apprehension.  _

_ “You know.. there’s only one person other than Jane for which I’ve ever cared for so deeply,” Thor said quietly. _

_ “Who?” _

_ “You.” _

_ Bruce’s mischievous look slowly faded from his face and he looked away, standing up. “You’ve only known me for a couple weeks,” he defended, “I don’t… think it’s likely.” _

_ “I do, Bruce,” Thor said as he stood in unison with Bruce, facing him directly. “And I know you feel something too. You always.. Let your hands linger, and ask personal questions, and you have no shame when it comes to making jokes about us acting like we’ve known each other for longer- like a married couple, I think you call it.”  _

_ “Those are just jokes,” Bruce insisted.  _

_ “Are they? Or do you feel what I feel when I say that you seem to understand me like no one I’ve met before,” Thor released a breath as he tried to tone down the emotions within the conversation a bit. He was terrified of saying the wrong thing even if everything he said felt right. “I don’t want us to part when we go back to New York. At least, we should stay friends.” _

_ Bruce watched Thor, silent for what seemed like minutes but was only a few seconds. He took a careful step forward, making the distance between the two’s faces decrease to just a couple inches. He never let their eye contact stray. Just as Bruce leaned forward, eyes shutting tightly, Thor took a small step back. It seemed insignificant- barely more than an inch. But Bruce took it as a sign of disapproval that he was all too used to from the people he cared about.  _

_ Bruce reopened his eyes and took in a shaky breath, letting out a soft chuckle. “We don’t have to talk about this. Ever. Don’t feel.. Forced.” _

_ Thor opened his mouth, then closed it, trying to find the right words. Bruce nodded and laughed again, rubbing the back of his neck roughly with his hand. “You sure had me going there.” _

_ “Bruce, I- I just had to break it off with Jane- I didn’t know it would be so difficult, to start something new-” Thor tried to explain the situation but everything seemed to make it worse. Bruce’s face was contorting as he tried to hide his saddened yet angry expression and Thor held his breath as he watched Bruce’s hand wave in the air.  _

_ “It’s no biggie, Thor. We’ll be leaving after tomorrow. We can be friends, just like you want. Just.. please, don’t mention this moment to me,” Bruce said softly, taking a few more steps towards the door of Thor’s motel room.  _

_ As Bruce turned around to leave, the right words finally came to Thor. “You deserve something long and meaningful, not just a kiss in a motel room in Mali that may not last when we go back to New York. I’ll wait. Until we’re both ready.” _

_ Bruce paused at the open door, seemingly like he would react to Thor’s confession of not exactly love, but instead he stepped out, closing the door behind him. Thor stayed where he stood for a long time, questioning if he should follow Bruce or leave him to think. Bruce stood outside of Thor’s door minutes after he walked out, wondering if he should step back inside and insist that a kiss in Mali will last. Even so, both of them slowly walked to their beds and settled in for a night full of embarrassment, but hope. Hope for whenever they might be ready.  _

 

Since leaving New York for this new excursion, he hadn’t had any contact with his friends. Not that he couldn’t talk to them- there was plenty of areas he could have sent a letter or tried to get service. But something in his heart was cloudy as he thought of how long it had been since he had left Jane for her betterment, and since he and Bruce had last engaged in an exchange that meant something more than friendly laughter. 

Even though they had spent years with each other, they rarely spent a moment alone. It was purposeful, and they both knew it. The conversation constantly threatened to arise, especially when their mutual friends poked and prodded about the fact that both Thor and Bruce had next to no love lives and never showed any intentions of changing that. 

In his mind, Thor was content with staying friends until he found someone who could partially fill whatever hole he had in his heart from his failed attempts at love. In his heart, he knew he couldn’t wait any longer to see if Bruce had obsessed about that one night as much as he had. He set the course and vowed not to break away- he would talk with Bruce as soon as he got back to New York. And something would change. He just didn’t know what yet. 

Thor sighed yet again, staring at the borders of Tunisia like they were actually fortunes written in such small text that if, perhaps, he could manage to read one, he would find out what the future would hold. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is my first time I've ever written a fanfic and I think it's going to be pretty long so even if it sucks, hopefully eventually it'll improve. Leave me a comment telling me what your thoughts or what I can improve on- and thanks so much for reading!


	2. Hardly Listening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor has been avoiding texts for weeks now. As he boards the plane to go home, will he finally face them?

After two more weeks of hard work, Thor began to pack his bags to head home. His maps were completed, scanned into a computer, and ready to be printed off and sent to all of his buyers. Once he was back at his office, he would have dozens of bubble mailers to fill, address, and put away for delivery. His work was never done, it seemed, as people requested updated versions of old maps or ordered massive collections of the prints he had available on his website. Whether he was remapping an area, packaging, dealing with customer complaints, or the weird few people who were searching for more than a map, he was busy. 

However, Thor knew that this return trip wouldn’t end the same as before. He knew his promise to talk to Bruce had to be kept, even if it meant that he would get behind on some of his orders. They didn’t matter as much as waiting four years for an answer that never seemed to come. 

As Thor hauled his luggage onto the baggage checking area, his phone dinged yet again, alerting him to the concern that all of his friends were currently feeling. Although he had been receiving numerous texts, he neglected to respond to a single one. There was very few he genuinely read- otherwise, they were left piled up, waiting to be dealt with. The text he had last received was the most worrying to him. It was sent by Steve, urging him to respond to Bruce’s messages, questioning why he hadn’t responded to anyone for the duration of his trip away. 

Bruce. Those messages had been completely muted since Thor had arrived in Tunisia. It’s not that Thor didn’t want to hear anything- well, he didn’t. He needed to be alone. Completely. In the past, he made sure that twice a week or so, a message would get to one of his friends within the group, and it would spread like wildfire. Well-meant messages like “I miss you guys”, “I’ll see you in a few weeks”, and “the scenery here is astounding” were sorely lacking this trip. 

Taking a deep breath, Thor finally pulled together enough courage to go to his muted numbers and unmute Bruce. Within moments, his phone was set alight with dozens of text messages. Thor stepped onto the plane, walking between the rows and settling his carry-on luggage in an overhead carrier. He left one hand open to begin reading the messages from the beginning. 

 

>Thor! I hope you’re having fun. I know it’s only been a few days, but we miss you here dearly. I just had a breakthrough! I’ve found that a synthetic protein mimicking a protein within the  _ Uromastyx dispar _ I studied during our time in Mali that is going to hopefully lead me to the answer of how regeneration works! Talk soon, Bruce

 

>Thor? I know usually it takes about a week for you to settle in, but all of us are getting worried. Shoot us a text soon! Missing you, Bruce

 

>Thor, Steve and Tony said you haven’t even texted them so it’s not just me. Why are you avoiding us? Did something happen? Are you okay, are you safe? Should I not have mentioned Mali? Hopeful, Bruce

 

>Thor-

 

He glanced up as a flight attendant mentioned that all cell services must be turned off at this point in the flight. “Oh, well, I just have a couple more texts I need to load and read-”

“Sir, we urge you to turn your cell services off otherwise our radar will face possible interference. Thank you!” The flight attendant turned around, walking to the front of the plane to begin the regulatory lesson on how to properly protect yourself in case of an accident. 

Reluctantly, Thor stowed his phone away after turning off his services. He would have continued reading regardless, but in the next message he had noticed the words “just a kiss a motel room.” He knew exactly how he recognized the phrase. This was what he had told Bruce years ago, describing what he didn’t want a relationship with Bruce to be like. No matter what came before, or after, that message was best saved for when he wouldn’t have an eleven hour flight to obsess over every implication it could possibly involve.

Yet.. he still thought of it. He wondered what Bruce had written before, or after, and even if he knew the message was loaded and he could access it without screwing up whatever radar this plane had, he didn’t want to. He wanted to make the first move this time. Bruce may not have been the one to outright say he cared for Thor, but he  _ had _ touched his thigh. Even if Thor was trying to look into it too much- which he probably was- a touch to the thigh  _ meant _ something. To him, at least. It gave him hope. So even though Thor knew he was a dumbass for stepping away, he also knew he had to do something first. 

As the flight from Tunisia to Newark, New Jersey landed, Thor turned on his mobile networks immediately. He stepped off the plane, breathed his first breath of fresh air in hours, and called for an Uber. He still had about a 45 minute car drive until he would be back home again, but he was thankful just to be close to somewhere he could order a disgustingly delicious shawarma sandwich from nearly any street corner. 

His next mission- read the last text from Bruce. Thor thought of a million excuses he could spout as to why he might have never received it instead of actually facing it head on, but he had promised himself. 

 

>Thor, I don’t understand how you could do this to us. To me. You’ve been gone for a month, no word, no indication you’re alive. I’m happy that you were never just a kiss in a motel room in Mali. I’m happy that you.. Never were. If you ever receive this, and for some reason, actually want to reply- don’t. Bruce

 

Sent two days ago. Thor felt himself lose his train of thought, his train of action, and he stumbled down a few steps at the entrance of the airport. He nearly fell, but caught himself on his luggage just soon enough to feel a slight wave of nausea hit him. Bruce didn’t want to talk to him anymore. He had spent all of this time away to finally come to terms for his feelings for Bruce, and to get over Jane once and for all, and it was for nothing. Because it wasn’t what was best for Bruce. 

Thor felt selfish. He had been so lost in his own head that he didn’t even consider what any of his friends were feeling as he hid himself away. As he climbed into the backseat of his Uber, silent to the driver as they began to drive enroute to Thor’s apartment, he opened Bruce’s message back up. 

 

_ I’m happy that you.. Never were. _

 

The words were just as shocking the second time as the first. If only Thor had made himself open the texts a day or two earlier, he might have prevented this. But he knew that this must have been stewing Bruce’s thoughts for a while. Although Bruce was no stranger to showing his anger- he commonly had massive outrages where things ended up broken- he rarely showed pain, or even emotion. In fact, it was rare to see him smile a true smile, and Thor was proud to be one of the few who had conjured one. 

Now, Thor knew he had made a mistake. Bruce was being outright vulnerable to him and he hadn’t given a single shit in preventing it. He racked his brain for the right words, cursing himself for his horrible skill of language. He loved all things visual- his maps, art, even weather made him feel at home, but the second someone asked him to write he faltered. Whenever he tried to say something, it came out wrong. 

It took Thor nearly twenty minutes to finally produce something which he found suitable for the occasion. He didn’t want to be too forward, for fear of hurting Bruce even more, but a certain amount of obviousness was needed to be able to convince Bruce to give him a second chance. He reread his message one last time, took a deep breath, and pressed the “send” button. 

 

<Bruce. This trip was a difficult one. I had a lot of thoughts on my mind and a lot of memories arose. I was unsure if I should have contacted any of you during such a hard time. I wish I would have now. I’ll be back home within half an hour. If you would like to meet, I’ll be going to the Cat Scratch around 9 P.M. tonight. I’ll have answers. And hopefully, the gift of your presence. Feel free to mention I’m back in town- but don’t invite anyone else. Dearly, Thor

 

As soon as the message sent, Thor felt like an idiot. Of course Bruce wouldn’t want to meet him- what dumb excuse was “i’ve had a lot on my mind”- “don’t invite anyone else”? Every word suddenly seemed wrong. He clicked his phone off and let it fall to his lap, his head extending backwards as he let out a small groan. 

The driver sat at the front of the car, driving as best they could through the horrible traffic of New York. They chuckled as Thor groaned, glancing at him in the rearview mirror. “Long day, eh?”

Thor blinked his eyes back open and looked to the front of the car, where an old man with white hair and oversized vintage looking sunglasses was driving, smiling. “Long day. Long week. Long month,” he muttered, feeling comforted by the laugh he immediately heard.

“It happens like that, pal. Tell me, it isn’t a problem with love, is it? Those are the hardest, it’s too bad if a kid like you already has to deal with it,” the driver said, nodding slowly, “my wife died a year ago. If I would give you any advice, it would be to take any opportunity and run with it. You never know when you’ll lose them.”

Thor was stunned by such touching advice, and he could only nod back in return as he felt his phone buzz on his lap. “Thank you,” he murmured as he glanced down, seeing a text from Bruce had already arrived. He honestly hadn’t expected to hear back so soon, if ever, and he held his breath as he opened the message. 

>You’re not dead after all. Til then, Bruce

 

Although Thor wasn’t entirely sure of when “til then” was, he took it as a good sign. It meant Bruce wanted to see him again, even after being snubbed for a month. The driver pulled up to the front of the apartment complex that Thor had made a home in, waiting until he had unloaded all of his luggage before they waved him over. 

“Kid. You listened to what I said, right?” The driver asked. “Go get them.”

He nodded again, and gave a small smile to the old man. “Thank you. I will.” As he walked up inside towards the elevator, he made a mental note to give this guy a five star rating- he seemed to care more than any therapist or family member he had tried to confide in before. 

Ascending in the elevator, he began to obsess over what he would wear, what speech he would prepare to give Bruce as an apology, or if he should even count on Bruce being there alone. He shook his head, taking the final steps to his door. He unlocked it, opened it, and let out a sigh of relief as he threw his suitcase, bag, and keys, down to the ground beside the door. He let it slam behind him, not bothering to lock it yet. His hand aimlessly felt around for his light switch, already planning on grabbing an early drink despite plans later to go to a bar.

To say it was shocking to find someone else was in his apartment with him was an understatement to say the least. Thor stood face to face with Bruce, eyes wide, breath halted, and hand quivering over the light switch. In his moment of fear and confusion, he flicked the lights back off. 

“We need to talk,” they said in unison to each other, the only light highlighting their faces being from the nearly completed sunset filtering in through two windows beside them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. It's like one a.m. where I am and I have work tomorrow morning so I'm kicking myself in the back for staying up so late to finish this. I didn't expect it to go so long ooops. I also hope you all caught that the driver was supposed to be a Stan Lee cameo? Is that dumb? Cliche? Oh well. Thanks for reading.


	3. Communicate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Bruce finally decide they need to talk about their situation. What conclusion will they draw?

Breathless, Thor scrambled backwards yet again, flicking the lightswitch back on. Although the sunset was terrific romantic lighting, it wasn’t the mood he was trying to set. After all, he had a lot of apologies and explanations to give Bruce. 

“I should start at the beginning,” Thor began, watching Bruce’s face carefully to monitor his reactions to his words. “Maybe we should sit down. It’ll be a while.”

Bruce let his hard stare at Thor fade, glancing over at a loveseat nearby. He nodded, and took a seat. Thor could tell visibly that he was moments away from an outburst of anger. Most times if Bruce seemed so out of sorts like this, Thor would at least attempt to de-escalate the situation in order to prevent anyone from getting hurt. This time, he knew he deserved it. He didn’t make any effort to calm Bruce. He had to make this right, even if it hurt him. 

“When I left for Tunisia, you said something to me. I’m not sure if you remember. It was a dumb remark, a simple comment that I thought about a lot during the beginning of my stay. You said something about how we had been friends for so long that sometimes you forget just how exactly we met,” Thor explained, continuing to eye Bruce carefully. “It took me a while. Actually, a very long time- about a month- for me to come to recognize that.. I don’t want you to forget how we met. In fact, I want you to remember. And I want us to talk about it.”

Bruce started to open his mouth to reply, but Thor waved his hand in the air as an attempt to silence him. “I’m not done yet.. I know I was the first person to step away that night. I know in my heart that that was a horrific decision. Perhaps even worse was that I forced you into staying friends with me. I’ve suffered through every single day since then. Wanting to talk about what happened, to fix it, and try it again. Try it for once.

Don’t get me wrong; I love our relationship. I can talk to you about anything, vent about Tony when he’s being a douchebag, whatever- and I feel like you understand my familial problems. My small tics. But we never had a chance to make it something more, because I stopped it in its tracks. And every moment I’m around you I think about that!” Thor exclaimed, running a hand through his hair in his moment of revelation. 

Bruce bit his lip. He was seemingly waiting for more words to be spoken, but Thor already felt emotionally drained. No wonder they never spoke about this before, it was nearly bedridding him. After allowing the air to still, Bruce sighed loudly and shook his head, his lips curling down into a pained expression. 

“Maybe you just shouldn’t be around me then. Maybe that’d make things better for you. It seemed like it was working in Tunisia- you were getting a lot of emotional work done there, I might as well leave you forever and have you get over all of your past mistakes,” Bruce taunted. His tone was laced with poison, the type that left your ears feeling numb like they had been yelled in despite his volume dropping below indoor levels. 

Thor stuttered as he tried to formulate a response. He had known Bruce would be defensive, if not vengeful, but this was beyond what he expected. The kind, gentle giant that was within Bruce seemed to be evolving into a pained being searching for some kind of retribution. “Bruce,” Thor said, carefully choosing his next words, “I don’t want to leave. I want to stay here. And talk this out, whether we end up wanting to walk out of here together or never see each other again. Although I hope it’ll be the former.”

Bruce took in a sharp breath, bringing his hand to a fist on the arm rest beside him. His face was transitioning between thoughts, emotions, quicker than Thor could read what he was feeling. Finally, as a pitiful look settled, Bruce’s eyes crinkled shut, his breathing began to flow unsteadily, and his face turned downwards. “Thor.. I thought I might have lost you. It doesn’t matter what you’re thinking of, what you’re going through.. You would always call home,” he forced out through shuttered breaths, lifting his eyes just enough to breach contact with Thor’s. 

“You think I wasn’t wondering what I did wrong every single second after I realized you weren’t gonna reply? You think I didn’t regret not stepping forward faster that day, before you could back away? You think I don’t wish I had mentioned something before? We both weren’t ready for it, it seemed, and you avoided the topic like the black plague!” Bruce shouted, throwing his hands upwards. 

“That’s because I thought you were avoiding the topic!” Thor threw back, reaching up to release his hair which was ensnared in a ponytail holder. It was getting too heated for him to not have his biggest defense- hiding behind his hair. 

As Thor’s hair flowed down his shoulders and back, Bruce was momentarily distracted. He seemed dumbfounded at Thor’s comment. “We’re both just idiots. A pair of fucking idiots. Trying to protect each others feelings when in reality all we need is to buck up and talk,” he said, beginning to snicker quietly. 

Thor blinked a few times, worried about the sudden laughter coming from Bruce. It wasn’t necessarily the right time to laugh, he thought, but he let himself join in. For weeks he couldn’t laugh with his best friend, and even if they were fighting, he jumped at the chance. “Idiots,” he repeated.

“The funniest thing is-” Bruce paused to laugh again, running a hand down his face, “I’ve waited for this moment for a while now. After that day I know I told you not to talk about it but.. I kind of did, you know?”

“Yeah. I know. I’m not the one who said not to talk about it though,” Thor pointed out, making a smug face. 

Bruce held up a hand, rolling his eyes. “You know, we should probably talk. Instead of argue about who’s at fault for us  _ not _ talking. So..,” Bruce huffed out a breath, turning his face downwards again as a light pink blush rose to his cheeks. “Do you mean to say that.. You want to have a different relationship than we have now?”

In this moment, Thor was unsure again. He glanced away, thinking of how good of friends they were, what could happen if he ruined it, and Jane. Even as the years faded and she was left further and further in the distance, she was in his mind. He had loved her so deeply that he had allowed this conversation to stall for over four years. But what he loved about her was somehow amplified in Bruce. They both had a gentle nature that was always forgiving for Thor’s mistakes, he could laugh and enjoy time with them, and despite them being somewhat puny in terms of size comparison to him, they felt they could protect him. Bruce felt he could protect Thor- but it should be said that Bruce took it a step further. He knew that Thor  _ needed _ to be protected. 

Bruce had been bullied throughout the years, not only in school, but by the time he had an established career as well. He dealt with people saying he would never accomplish anything because all of his ideas were too far out with no way to backup his claims other than pure intuition and hope. He proved them wrong more often than not, yet they still made fun of him. On the inside, Bruce was pained at the fact that he wasn’t truly respected, but having his friends, having Thor, always helped him get past it. 

Thor knew that Bruce dealt with people putting it down. They talked about it so often that he felt they were connected so tightly on the subject they could write a biography for the other person with perfected details. But the importance of talking to Bruce about  _ his _ struggles is Bruce had always cared about Thor’s. Whether it be Thor’s brother edging in and out of his life, or his lack of parents, he had a lot to deal with. Add in a heavy dash of a bad past with some crime and fighting, and he and Bruce were a perfect match. Both bruised. But both ready to let it fade away if they came together. 

“Yes,” Thor finally whispered, wondering whether or not Bruce would actually be able to hear him or not. That worry was quickly fixed when Bruce stepped towards him, closing their five foot distance. “Bruce, I want to try being with you. And if it doesn’t work out.. We’ll still be friends. But I want more.”

Bruce nodded his head in agreeance, secretly cursing at himself. He had come to Thor’s apartment with plans to yell at Thor for an hour, leave, and not return until Steve and Tony forced them to make up, but it had all gone to shit. Regardless, he was.. Happy. Or hopeful, more like. He continued his slow walking over to Thor, stopping directly in front of them. Their height difference was striking- Bruce had to look up, Thor had to look down, but they didn’t mind.

Thor wasn’t going to risk ruining it this time. He leaned down to meet Bruce, where he was standing half expectantly, half nervous. He paused there, their eyes staring fiercely at each other. He could feel Bruce’s breath on his lips, nose, even spreading to his cheeks. In this moment, his shoulders relaxed. His body relaxed. He relaxed. Despite all of the worrying he had done in Tunisia, in Mali, and the years between them, this was finally happening. And he was all too happy about it.

He reached his hands out, softly cupping Bruce’s chin with one and cradling one of his cheeks in the other. He could hear a soft hitch in Bruce’s breath as they touched one another, and soon after Bruce’s arms had wrapped around Thor’s neck as they finally leaned in for a kiss. Bruce was nearly on his tiptoes, which probably would have felt exceedingly emasculating for anyone else, but he didn’t care. Thor’s lips were soft, and his hands were so gentle that he didn’t know what he should focus on in the moment. He could only dream that it would happen again and this wouldn’t be a one time fling occurring when they were both weak.

After a long few seconds, Thor pulled away and took a step back. This time, it didn’t feel like he was trying to get away from Bruce out of disinterest, instead it felt like he was too interested. “Well. It was worth the wait,” he joked, causing Bruce to instantly begin laughing. They shared an innocent breath, both still reeling in thought. 

“We should probably say.. Something to everyone, right?” Bruce asked hesitantly. The idea of them being a couple was a very positive one until they considered all of the people who may be affected. Albeit, they were almost like family, so they hoped they would be supportive, but Thor hadn’t necessarily told anyone he was bisexual, and Bruce.. Well, Bruce didn’t really talk much when the subject of love came up. As far as Thor knew, he was just innocent and rather naive. 

So as they glanced back out the window at the now darkened sky, Thor reached over and gently grabbed Bruce’s hand and hold it at their sides, eliciting a small glance and smile to be shared between both of them. And as they stood there together, they thought about each other, about the years, and thought of what the future may hold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes it's been days since I updated so I'm sorry! But the pair have finally talked through everything and had their first kiss. Awesome. But stay tuned because there's a lot that's going to happen. Just wait.


	4. Troubled Winks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki torments Thor in his dreams until he goes to his last resort- calling up Bruce and inviting him over.

Running. 

He couldn’t stop. He couldn’t turn around or else it would catch him. 

It seemed like it had been hours since Thor had begun his race away from the man- if it could be called that. 

His breath was fading away, making him deflate like a balloon. His pace slowed to a jog, to a walk, and finally, a stagger. His knees gave way underneath him and he collapsed, head slammed against the earthy surface beneath him. His hair spread around him like daggers tugging at his skull, causing him to groan painfully. 

Footsteps which had originally been pounding footfalls of a running creature were getting closer until it paused at Thor’s feet. It kicked his leg, resulting in another pained groan. Slowly, but seemingly effortlessly, the creature gripped Thor by the thighs and turned him over onto his back, forcing him to look into its eyes. 

“Brother,” Loki greeted him, blue eyes tinged with fire glaring down at him. “I can’t say I missed you.” 

With a kick to the face, suddenly Thor found himself going over a cliff, screaming, arms and legs waving violently until he woke up with a start, shouting. 

His breath was ragged and his body was covered in sweat. He could barely remember where he was despite it being his own home. He reached up to grab his pounding head and stumbled to his feet, making his way towards the restroom. He grabbed a cup from the kitchen on the way, filled it with water, and prepared four ibuprofen pills to take from his medicine cabinet. 

As he felt another aching wave of discomfort rack his brain, he downed all four pills at once and gripped onto the edge of the bathroom sink counter. These dreams were a common occurrence when he was at home. They were the reason he rarely stayed over when Rhodey offered everyone his place the night after drinking, and the reason he was somehow always willing to take on another trip away. 

Thor began his journey back into his bedroom, eyes lingering sleepily on the floor. It would be about an hour before he could actually sleep again since the pain medicine took a while to get working. To pass the time, he sat in bed, snuggled underneath covers, and began to scroll through his feeds. On Twitter, Bucky and Steve were having a somewhat heated argument about goats- who knows, Thor thought- Sam had posted photos of his latest trip skydiving on Instagram, and Snapchat was filled with photos of all of his friends as they went through their busy New York lives.

He watched Bruce’s story a few times in a row before he noticed that the most recent photo, of a pizza he had ordered, had only been posted about a half an hour ago. Checking the time, he realized he had barely been able to sleep for two hours without waking up from a dream. It had been awhile since he could remember a night in his bed without waking up at least once, but this time it happened so quickly he was slightly nervous.

Regardless, unless Bruce ate pizza and immediately went to sleep, he was awake. And Thor could vent to him for a few minutes as he tried to settle back down to rest.

 

<Bruce, are you awake?

 

Moments later, his phone screen lit up with a notification. 

 

>Yes, what’s up?

 

<I had another dream. 

 

>About Loki?

 

<Yes.

 

There was a noticeable pause after this message. Thor assumed that Bruce must have finally went to bed, bored of the conversation already, so he began to settle himself underneath his covers to sleep. Just as his eyes closed for his first attempt at counting sheep, Thor’s phone buzzed again.

 

>Do you want me to come over?

 

His immediate thought was “hell yes”. Having Bruce there to comfort him would surely help him get some much needed rest. But then he began to think- would Bruce stay? Where would he sleep? What if he woke up screaming again? They had just decided to try a romantic relationship together the night before and it worried him endlessly that he would ruin it any turn he took. As he was considering his options, he felt his phone buzz yet again. 

 

>Don’t worry about it, I was just offering. Just in case.

 

Before he realized it, his thumbs were dashing along the keyboard, writing a response.

 

<Come over. I’ll unlock the door.

 

Thor waited in silence by on his couch after he had unlocked his door. His thumbs twiddled together and his eyes darted back and forth between his door and the bedroom. He could feel himself getting drowsy again but he knew if he rushed back to sleep he would just get woken up by his headache again. 

After a good ten minutes of waiting, Thor couldn’t hold off any longer. He felt himself slump against the couch, laying across the cushions. His eyes fluttered to a close and he immediately picked his dream back up where it was. 

He was falling, arms flailing wildly. Somehow, Loki was beside him the entire time- but he was standing. It was like Thor was frozen in one area where he would fall forever while Loki was completely unaffected. 

“Brother!” Thor shouted, reaching out in hope that Loki would help him. But Loki sneered. 

He pushed Thor further away and began to walk off into darkness. “I’m no brother to you. Not since you weren’t willing to help me in my weakest time,” Loki said harshly. 

As Loki continued to walk away, Thor felt his dream felt finally slam into the ground. His bones felt like they shattered, his body contorted, and he rolled onto his back painfully so as he died he could look at the sky. It was blood red, with streaks of black and grey. The last thing he saw was a glimmer of green out of the corner of his eye, and a knife stuck in his chest, through to his vertebrae- forcing them apart. 

He awoke with another shout, sitting up immediately, hands covering his face. His shoulders were still shuddering when he felt hands rest on them, trying to smooth them into a relaxed stance.

“Thor, it’s okay. It was just a dream,” Bruce told him, sitting close but across from him on a coffee table since Thor’s large frame took up the entire couch. “You’re fine now.”

Thor winced as Bruce spoke, slowly opening up his eyes to check and make sure it was really him. His eyes were red and swollen and his face with covered with tears from when he had fallen asleep. He immediately felt like a wimp; every inch of his body wished he hadn’t invited Bruce at all. He had already managed to go back to sleep. Albeit, he woke back up again from another nightmare, but he could have managed without Bruce. Even so, as Bruce reached over to wipe away a fresh tear that had fallen, Thor relaxed more than he had for countless nights.

Slowly he rose to his feet and motioned for Bruce to follow him. Thor lead him into his bedroom and he himself slid underneath the covers, motioning to a chair that sat beside his bed at his desk. “You can sit there if you’d like. I know it sounds weird, but.. I just need someone to talk me to sleep. Y’know?” he said quietly, thankful for Bruce’s expression of agreeance.

“Before, when I couldn’t sleep,” Bruce began, hesitantly turning the desk’s chair around and sitting in it, “I would.. Imagine I was talking to my mother. It wouldn’t necessarily help much, but it kept my mind off of other things. Like my dad. Or all of my failures.”

This was the most exposed Bruce had been to Thor in a long time. He racked his brain, trying to think of the specifics. He remembered Bruce talking about hating his dad, but he didn’t exactly know why. “What do you mean your dad? And your failures? If you’re talking about that incident when you first tried using those backgammon rays-” Thor began.

“Gamma rays,” Bruce corrected, stifling a laugh despite the tense mood. “And that was a big failure for me. It was horrible. It didn’t work and it killed a lot of mice that.. Didn’t necessarily deserve it. Not that any of them do, but..” he shook his head, bringing himself back to his main point. “My dad wasn’t a good dad. He wasn’t even close to what you would imagine as.. A dad in general. I don’t know why I call him dad- he doesn’t even deserve it. I should call him father, because..” Bruce paused.

His face showed that he was considering whether or not to actually say his next words. But they seemed to be pretty open tonight, so he figured that Thor would be tired and probably forget it, and if not, it would still be fine. “My father used to abuse me and my mom. She tried to get me away, that way I could have a happy childhood finally, but he stopped her. He punched her. Threw her on the ground. And smashed her head in. All while I was watching. After that, I gave up on my hopes of one day being a scientist who could stop death. Or bring people back from the dead. Every since then I just want to prolong life and make it better.” 

Thor sat in shock. His mouth was slightly agape, and he had a confused expression on his face. He had always wondered why Bruce never talked about his parents or offered to let Thor and their friends meet them. But Thor just couldn’t understand. Bruce had held this in all these years. How come he never was willing to talk about it before? They were supposed to be friends, best friends, and something in his heart tugged at the fact that maybe it was because they had just now reached a deeper point. 

However, Thor couldn’t help as a yawn slowly pulled itself from his body. Bruce chuckled and leaned back in his chair, face looking relieved. “You’re getting tired. You should go to sleep. I’ll be here in case anything happens. I need to look over some reports before morning anyway, I can do that on your computer,” Bruce said in a hushed tone, turning around to begin working already. 

If Thor hadn’t had been so tired he would have protested Bruce staying awake most of the night for him. Instead, he just slowly nodded his head and pulled his comforter tighter around himself. It felt awkward to try and sleep while a man he felt an urge to kiss every second was sat just a few feet away, but he just grinned it away. 

Tomorrow would be a big day for them. They had scheduled a meet up with all of their friends and although they didn’t necessarily promise each other they would reveal their relationship yet, it was a possibility. Regardless, things would be different for them. There was no way they wouldn’t feel the dynamic change even just slightly. 

As Thor felt his eyes attempt to flutter closed, he forced them open and turned his head to where Bruce already seemed to be working intently. Hearing about Bruce’s family and his reasoning behind his life’s work made him seem just ever so slightly more endearing. He had been through a lot already- to have watched his mother get killed when he was still young and use it to make something positive was unbelievably enviable. Thor wished he could translate the problems he had with his brother into something undeniably 

. 

“Bruce,” Thor whispered, blinking into the vague darkness aside from the brightness of the computer screen. “You should sleep at some point… and kiss me goodnight.” The last part was barely audible- Thor was afraid of seeming like wimp again- yet Bruce still managed to catch it. 

Bruce turned around smiling and stood, walking over to the bed and kneeling beside Thor. He looked into Thor’s sleepy eyes for a few moments before leaning forward and giving him a goodnight’s kiss. “I’ll make sure I get sleep at some point, sleepyhead,” Bruce teased.

In his final moments of consciousness, Thor felt himself grinning again. Being around Bruce and getting kissed by him made him feel like a giddy teenager getting his first kiss. So as his eyes closed, finally, he was contented by good dreams for the rest of the night. Not a single thought of his brother crossed his mind. Rather, it was all Bruce. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we've had our first few days of school and YIKES honestly I'm tired of it already I have 5 AP classes and each of them makes me feel like my insides are being touched by the melting stick. But anyway, comment if you'd like, and thanks for reading.


	5. Night Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bruce and Thor are excited to hang out with their friends for the first time since they'd decided to go out- but Thor worries about revealing the news, especially considering the other problems he's facing.

Thor and Bruce walked side by side through the crowded New York City sidewalk, talking absently about their day. Thor had finally finished up shipping his orders from Tunisia and had begun to deal with customer complaints for past maps- mainly damages in shipping which for some reason he ended up having to fix. Bruce, on the other hand, had a much more positive day. His protein research was yielding results close enough to what he hoped that he knew he was on the right track. 

However, even though their words signalled a feeling of ease between them, they were tense. They were headed in the direction of the Cat Scratch Bar- a hang out for them and their friends. It was the first night everyone could coordinate free in a while, so it felt like the perfect time to reveal their secret since they would be together. But they still were apprehensive. 

Bruce had mentioned countless times that Steve and Bucky seemed to be closer than they appear, but Thor was too naive to see between the lines and he just thought they were single. For Tony and Pepper, their relationship was pretty skewed from societal norms as well, considering Pepper held about 90 percent of the power. Sam was happily living the playboy life, showing off his amazing muscles and skill, while Rhodey stayed relatively quiet about his relationships. Being in the army had caused him to give up many things in his life, and they always assumed that included love. 

Apart, their group seemed like it would never have worked, but together, their chemistry is undeniable. Conversation always flows easily and everyone is connected somehow. Although Tony isn’t necessarily close to Sam, Steve is, and Steve is close to Tony, and Tony is close to Rhodey, so by default Sam and Rhodey are close as well. It all becomes a bit messy when thinking about how exactly their relationships worked so outsiders like Pepper didn’t even bother to try. They just knew these men loved each other in a way none of them would be willing to admit, especially Thor and Bruce. 

Thor stepped in the doors first, holding the door open for Bruce as he wandered in behind him. Because their heads were nearly a foot apart in height, Thor had to lean down slightly in the loud, crowded bar to be able to let his voice be heard. “I think I caught a glance of Sam that way, come on!” He tugged gently on Bruce’s arm, choosing not to hold his hand yet. Once they were both headed in the same directions, their arms rested at their sides, both of them trying to look normal. 

Once they were in sight of the other men, they heard rallying cries of greetings. Mainly shocked voices that Thor had actually showed up, considering he had snubbed them for months, but others were excited to see Bruce as well. 

Tony stood up and jogged towards them, throwing his arms around both of their shoulders after he reached them. They continued walking as Tony grinned, looking at both of them expectantly. “So, Bruce, how’ve you been? It’s been so long since we’ve all gotten together- why the rush this time? Did your study get any results?”

Bruce grinned at the question, raising his hands as he started to explain his study passionately, hands motioning through the air as he made his points and examples. The boys gathered around him at the table and listened, all of their faces delighted that what he had been working on for years was finally receiving some progress. 

Thor, however, was distracted. He couldn’t listening to a single word Bruce had said despite being the one who was sitting beside him, exceedingly close in fact. Bruce’s face was enough to tell him everything he needed to know. He reached out underneath the table where his hands had been resting on his thighs, and placed a hand gently on Bruce’s knee, patting in once in a type of “wow I’m amazed” gesture. Bruce glanced at him as he continued speaking, smiling wider than before.

The touch, although small, hadn’t gone unnoticed by the rest of the group. As Bruce and Thor turned away to order drinks from a waitress, Bucky leaned over to Steve and murmured a question, probably along the lines of “are they together”. However, both of them stayed quiet and continued to talk among the group like normal. 

“So,” Thor started, looking around as everyone turned their attention back to him. “I’m sorry.” There was protests in the air, Rhodey shouted bullshit, and Steve just rolled his eyes. Thor laughed quietly, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Let me explain.. I had a lot of thinking to do, and it wasn’t the type I could do with you guys. I love you all so much, but it was just.. Necessary that I had some alone time,” Thor ended softly, glancing around for reaction. 

Tony and Bucky glanced at each other and shrugged, seemingly indifferent to the explanation. They were only teasing to begin with- they understood what it felt like to need to get away. Steve and Sam both were similar, but they had slightly more amused looks on their faces. It’s not that they were pissed, per say, they were just expecting a more detailed explanation. 

And Rhodey.. Rhodey seemed worried. His eyebrows were furrowed together and he watched Thor carefully, leaning forward. “Are you doing okay Thor? Is there anything you need to talk about?” He asked. This caught Bruce’s attention, who had previously been zoning out as he drank away at his martini since he had already heard Thor’s reasons. 

“Yeah, is there anything you’re not telling us?” Bruce asked, causing everyone’s worry to come together and increase. If Bruce wasn’t in the loop of something with Thor, then something 

to be up. 

With a small huff and smile, Thor glanced down where his whiskey sat on the table, condensation rolling down the side. He had a big choice to make quickly. Did he want to let everyone know what was actually going on? Or should he save it for Bruce? Or not mention it to anyone?

Something within him convinced himself he should do it. So with a shaky breath, Thor began speaking, eyes not lifting from his glass once. “My brother.. Loki.. I don’t talk about him much because.. We were in a difficult situation a few years ago. Back when I was like 25, he got into some gambling trouble, I should say? And I tried to help. I really did. But it didn’t.. Help. And I haven’t seen him since,” Thor explained. 

With one glance towards Bruce, Thor continued. “Until recently. I had been dreaming about him for a while.. All the time just nightmare after nightmare of him dying 

and blaming it on me. And then I got a call. When I left for Tunisia.” Bruce’s eyes widened and he watched Thor, surprised. 

“You didn’t tell me that part,” Bruce muttered, instantly feeling bad on two fronts- not only was he not able to get to the bottom of what was truly bothering Thor, but he didn’t feel open enough with Bruce to admit it anyway. So either he wasn’t caring enough or wasn’t worth caring about. Either option made him feel like shit, but neither of them was the truth. 

Still, Bruce reached over and place a hand on Thor’s shoulder, attempting to comfort him. He knew how difficult the situation had to be, and even if he didn’t have all the details, he knew enough to be worried. “I’m sorry,” Thor whispered to him.

Rhodey cleared his throat, trying to get the two men to rejoin the group instead of focusing on each other. “So you’re telling me you got a call? What did he say? Did he tell you where he was?”

Thor raised his hands to show his cluelessness. “It was the most.. Unreadable call he could have given me. I remember the words exactly because they were that crazy. He told me, ‘Thor. The flames are rising on us. You failed me once but I’ll give you another chance. I’ll see you when I’m singed.’ It was.. Terrifying.” He let his head fall towards the table, using his hands to catch it and prop it up. 

The seven men sat in silence for a few moments before Tony suddenly slammed his hand against the table, causing Thor’s elbow to slip out from under him and his forehead to hit the table. He rubbed it gently, leaning back up to glare at Tony. 

“He’s in trouble, Thor. Did you not understand that?” Tony asked, seemingly incredulous. “But he’s gonna get out. Injured. That’s why he said he was going to come out singed. So basically, he’s gonna find you and expect you to help him. That sucks,” Tony downed the rest of his own drink with one gulp, raising his hand for another. 

“I don’t know if I would really agree with that, I think it was just the Loki bullshit I’m used to from my childhood. Always tormenting me once I feel like I’ve gotten over everything he’s done to me, all the manipulation..” His eyes flickered to the table once again. It was a difficult conversation to have. Most of his fear and pain that he carried with him didn’t even stem from his parent’s death- it was Loki. 

Through the years, the exact story had faded from his mind. He didn’t remember exactly how he had failed Loki, but he knew even before that fateful night that Loki was always making him feel inferior. 

One specific memory he had was when they were really young. Thor had been making new friends in his school, but Loki, one year ahead of him, spread a rumor about him being in love with one of those friends. It wasn’t true, and he realized now that Loki was probably just jealous that Thor had managed to find a niche so easily, but it stunted him. He never felt confident to be who he was after that because everyone had avoided him like the black plague at the thought of him liking a boy. 

Which is why now, as Bruce whispered into Thor’s ear, he leaned away initially. The guys had no idea, he thought, and he didn’t want to give them any reason to question and end up leaving him like his friends from elementary school. “Thor, we should tell them..” Bruce told him once Thor had hesitantly come back towards Bruce to hear what he had to say. 

The look on Thor’s face was terrified enough to make anyone feel guilty and change their mind, but Bruce knew Thor’s way of going about things, especially with this new Loki development. If he didn’t force him to say it now, it would never be said. 

“We actually have some other news for you guys,” Bruce said, clapping his hands together once, “And hopefully it’s a little less.. Sad. Or, well, less thought-to-be-dead-brother-coming-back-to-say-hello. Me and Thor have actually decided.. To try out a relationship.” Bruce braced himself against Thor, letting his side rest against Thor’s, waiting for some kind of big reaction. 

Steve and Bucky smiled at each other knowingly, laughing to themselves as Tony suddenly cursed, tossing a ten over to Rhodey. Sam, himself, was rather shocked. He looked around at all of the other men, not necessarily disapprovingly, but as if he had been left out. “You’re betting on their relationship? Dick move,” Sam muttered, but he was mainly sad no one had mentioned it to him before.

Thor laughed gratefully, letting his own side rest against Bruce’s, them supporting each other as they sat. While Tony and Sam began to argue, he turned his head towards Bruce and they shared a quick kiss. Their fears had been dropped nearly as quickly as they had risen. They felt like their future was clear and ready to be followed, with the only exception being.. Loki. 

However, Thor assumed he would hear no word from Loki for another couple months if not years. So he let his shoulders relax, laughing along with his friends as he got to interact with the people he was closest to for the first time in a while. 

A couple hours later, fairly tipsy, Bruce and Thor were led home by Rhodey- one of the designated drivers for the night. He gave them both a pat on the back after he let them into Thor’s apartment with a key Thor kept hidden underneath a mat, telling them to have a good night. 

Thor stepped inside backwards, watching Bruce’s face closely as they walked. Bruce was watching him just as intently, smiling slightly up at him. He let his fingers brush along Bruce’s hands, touching their fingertips together first, then clasping them together tightly after he kicked his door closed. 

Their mouths locked together after their hands had, pausing only to get themselves seated on Thor’s couch before they continued to kiss. It had been a great night, and they could barely keep themselves from exploding from the happiness they were feeling about being with their friends, but also being together. It was all working out well so far, with barely any kinks in the system. 

So when a light flickered on, lighting up the darkened room that had previously only been lit by stars filtering through the window, both of the men pulled apart and squinted their eyes, looking around for the source of this change. Thor’s grasp on Bruce became tighter as he finally saw who was standing by the lightswitch, head becoming instantaneously dizzy. 

“Brother, you haven’t introduced me to.. Your boyfriend yet, how rude,” Loki said jokingly, holding onto his side painfully. 

Thor felt a burning in his stomach, partly from alcohol, and partly from the sight of his brother. He turned away, breathing becoming fast, hands reaching up to run through his loose hair, and he rushed to the restroom. Bruce followed behind him, not without glaring at Loki first. He held Thor’s long hair as he began to vomit into the toilet, groaning loudly. Tears were beginning to appear on his cheeks, his mind was blurry. He didn’t know what to do other than just sit in the restroom, Bruce’s arms around him, questioning where they would go from here. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes school is rlly... school I mean AP Physics???? just take me away now. But I still wanted to contribute something in this fic for thorbruce week so I tried to attach as many of the prompts into this one chapter, I hope it's okay. Leave a comment if you want, and thanks for reading


	6. Family Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki stops in for a visit with his brother Thor and Thor's boyfriend, Bruce. Unannounced. Thor doesn't really like it.

“He’s still going to be out there, Thor. It’s useless to wait any longer. I’m pretty sure you’ve vomited everything in your stomach,” Bruce murmured, continuing to caress the side of Thor’s face once more before he stopped the motion. “I can go out first if you need me to..” 

Thor shook his head, lifting himself up from where he had been resting sideways on Bruce’s lap. They had been tucked away in the restroom for about ten minutes and he knew that his brother had to be judging him by now. Just like so many times when they were younger, he ran away from what made him uncomfortable and hid. 

Although his legs still felt like jello and his mind was clouded with fear, he pushed himself to his feet and took a deep breath. After taking one last second to calm himself, he motioned at Bruce to stay in the restroom and then took a step outside. His body instantly tensed at the sight of his brother  _ chilling _ on his couch. For as long as he had lived in this apartment, which had been a considerable amount of time, he had never even imagined that his brother would be inside of it.

At the sound of the bathroom door opening, Loki slowly turned around to face Thor, a smile revealed on his lips. “Brother!” Loki shouted, standing up to walk to meet Thor halfway. “I missed you so much. After what happened.. I thought I’d never see you again.” His expression was genuine, his hand resting gently over his heart. 

Everything about this interaction had Thor set on edge. Loki hadn’t been so kind to him since they were children, if back then could even count. Yet somehow, deep in his soul, Thor craved for this to be an honest moment. He had always wished he and his brother were closer and if this opportunity gave him a chance at that, he was going to take it. His eyes glanced down to Loki’s side, noticing a large stain of blood on the blue shirt he was wearing over what seemed to be an open wound. 

“Loki, you’re hurt. How come you came here? You should’ve gone to a hospital,” Thor exclaimed, rushing back into the restroom past Bruce who had sneaked out so he could see what was happening. While Thor was busy collecting some rubbing alcohol, bandages, and cream to fix up Loki’s wound, Bruce and him took a chance to speak for the first time.

With a hand reached out to shake, Loki made the first move to speak. “My name’s Loki. I’m Thor’s brother,” He said, smiling again slightly when Bruce stepped forward and accepted the hand shake. “But that’s probably obviously. You, however.. I have no idea who you are!”

Bruce laughed awkwardly, glancing to the ground for a second. “Well, me and Thor just.. Started dating.. Made it official.. Became boyfriends, whatever it is, but we’ve been friends for way longer. About four years ago?” He shrugged his shoulders, looking curiously up at Loki. “He’s actually told me a lot about you. You matter a lot to him, I guess.” 

Loki nodded his head slowly, processing what he was being told. “So you met about two years after I disappeared.. Nice. It sucks that I missed it,” he said quietly. This time, Loki took a turn at being awkward, moving slowly back to the couch. His legs and body seemed stiff, or at least in a lot of pain. Whatever had hurt him was serious. 

Bruce followed him to the couch, sitting down a couple cushions away so Thor would have room. He knew Thor had questions, but he wasn’t so sure if Loki would be willing to be honest with him. So he decided that he would try to get some answers out of him. As the restroom door opened quietly, and Thor walked towards them, facing Loki’s back, Bruce began. “So.. what happened there, huh? Thor thought you were gone forever. Dead.”

Thor instantly understood what Bruce was trying to do and he slowed his pace, waiting to hear an answer. He knew, also, that if Loki knew he was in earshot, the answer might be very different. 

“Well..” Loki began, oblivious to the trick being played on him, “I got in a bit of trouble. Thor tried to help me out.. I think. I’m not entirely sure, but that’s what I’ve chosen to believe. I had been betting too much money on some illegal things, and there was a massive culminating event where all bets were to be distributed to the rightful winners. I had lost, bad. I didn’t have the money. Thor came along to help me fend off anyone angry about that. It just didn’t work. 

We got separated, and soon enough, I was tied up, shipped off, and I had no idea where I was. It took a couple years just to get loose from the people who were holding me hostage, making me do work to pay off the debts I had accrued.. They said they were helping me. But they weren’t. Not really,” Loki said quietly, pain evident in his tone. 

“So once I got away, I started my journey back home. I tried to contact Thor but his phone seemed to have changed. I tried to find our childhood house, where are parents were.. But they were there no longer. I got sidetracked then, looking for my mother.. And that leads me to now. I wasn’t able to find them, but I did finally catch trail of my brother. All I want is answers and if Thor is still angry with me.. I’ll go.”

Thor coughed quietly behind the two men, alerting Loki to his presence. Loki’s face seemed distraught at his brother having heard everything, but this confused Thor. Nothing that he said was necessarily incriminating.. He didn’t understand what Loki didn’t want him to hear. 

“Mother and father got hurt. It was a while ago, right after you disappeared. They were trying to find you, going to the ends of the earth, spending all of their capital as they did. Mother made a mistake and talked to the wrong person. She passed away. Father passed away trying to protect her,” Thor said, sitting down beside Loki. He began to address the wound, lifting the blue shirt that Loki had been wearing up to assess the area. 

He hadn’t noticed, but the shirt was too big for him, as was his pants, and even shoes. He looked like a mess. The brothers were both known for their long hair, and his seemed greasy as if it hadn’t been washed in months. He had no idea what ends to the earth Loki had been on, but he knew that something bad had happened. Regardless, he dealt with the problem at hand. He cleaned the wound with alcohol, ignoring Loki’s yelps of pain, and rubbed some cream to help it heal faster before he sealed it with a tight bandage that wrapped around his entire midriff.

“So, Loki,” Thor began, standing up to toss away the dirty supplies in the kitchen trash can, using the sink to clean his bloody hands, “how exactly did you get such a.. Violent, wound? What happened to you exactly?” 

Loki stretched his arms above his head, finally relaxing back into the couch now that his wound wasn’t stinging from whatever dirt and bacteria had been resting in it previously. Bruce cautiously stood up and took a seat on one of the kitchen stools Thor was standing by. To him, Loki was a dangerous man who could very well hurt either of them, but Thor was hoping for something better. Loki hadn’t necessarily hurt him before, so he wasn’t as worried. Still, he reached an arm around his boyfriend and stepped closer, trying to give him some comfort.

“A lot of people were angry at me, like you could assume. Some of them didn’t care about trapping me so long as they could get their punch in at me. The latest one I encountered, basically blocks away from here, was an old betting buddy who apparently lost trust from people in the game and hasn’t been able to make money doing bets since. He stabbed me and let me go on my very merry way,” Loki explained, grimacing to express his fake happiness. 

Thor couldn’t help but snort a little at this explanation. Loki and him had practiced fighting in many different arenas of physicality when they were younger. They both had been on the wrestling team and their father forced them to practice boxing on the side until they were old enough to start ignoring him. Still, the lessons remained with Thor to this day and he worked out whenever he could to maintain strength. Loki, on the other hand, clearly hadn’t suffered the same fate. 

He was a string bean. A tadpole. A pencil. He had no muscles whatsoever, and assumably, no skill. Losing a fight to someone with a knife shouldn’t have happened for someone who has a background like him, but he seemed to have fallen off. “What happened to all of our nights in the wrestling ring? Forgot how to spar?”

“Har, har,” Loki muttered, running his hands through his hair. “I’m stronger than you think. I just didn’t want to kill the guy. I went too easy.” 

Bruce looked exceedingly alarmed at this comment and he tried to motion at Thor to make Loki leave. Bruce, too, had a few moves leftover from past nights out learning jiu jitsu with their friends, but he didn’t trust himself with a guy who seemingly was willing to kill people. Even Thor raised an eyebrow, but he shrugged at Bruce. He couldn’t just throw out his own brother, especially when he caused for most of this trouble to happen.

Loki clearly couldn’t remember at the moment. But Thor could. Back on that night, when heads began to turn in disgust at Loki’s lack of payment, Thor slipped into the background. He let his brother get taken away. He was tired of protecting him after he made mistakes, tired of going out of his way to help him when everything was his fault. He just didn’t realize how bad Loki had it. 

He had thought the men would take Loki away for a couple minutes, beat up on him, and then Thor could lead him back him home, acting like a savior, hoping that Loki finally learned his lesson. Clearly, that isn’t how it worked out. He had feared ever since then that Loki would realize what happened and take revenge on him. That’s where his nightmares came from- not necessarily Loki being a bad person, but  _ him.  _

“Bruce.. It’s getting pretty late. It’s nearly midnight. We had a nice night out with the guys, but I’m too sober to try and deal with Loki and you right now. You should probably head home. I’ll see you tomorrow?” Thor rubbed his eyes sleepily, smiling at Bruce. Seeing the sour look on Bruce’s face, his smile immediately downturned and he realized he said something wrong.

“So.. I’m something for you to deal with? Just like your long lost brother?” Bruce muttered quietly, jumping down from the stool. He took a few steps away, huffing as he went, but slowly turned around to face Thor. “I’ll see you whenever you’re ready to deal with me,” he shot at Thor, not giving him a chance to reply before storming out completely.

Loki snickered quietly from his place on the couch, looking between Thor’s lost expression and the door where Bruce had disappeared out of. “You definitely messed up there.. But I can see it in his eyes, he’s lovestruck, he’ll come back,” he said kindly, letting his glance settle on Thor.

It took him a few seconds before he gathered his thoughts, but Thor decided to focus on his brother for now rather than Bruce. He walked to his bedroom and found some acceptable clothes for Loki that fit better than what he was currently wearing, and at least didn’t have blood stains. “Put these on. You can sleep on the couch. But after that we talk about where you go from here.” 

“So you’re saying I don’t get to pay rent and live with my amazing brother, like we had before? What a shame..” Loki teased, gathering the clothes up from the pile Thor had tossed them in on the couch. 

Thor looked unamused, his expression bordering between angry and confused. “I have a boyfriend. Do I really want my brother to be lurking around the corners of my apartment every waking hour? No. You’ve already made him uncomfortable enough to leave once. It’s not happening again.”

Loki chuckled to hide the saddened expression on his face. His head turned down towards the clothes as he stepped towards the restroom, seeking a place to change into new clothes for the night. “You know.. You really care about him. I’m so happy for you. But, I remember there was a time where, even if I was a dick to you.. Made you mad.. You wanted what was best for me. And now you seem to have forgotten it.”

“I haven’t forgotten. I just have different priorities than you now,” Thor replied quietly, setting out a blanket and pillow from a linen closet. He patted it and nodded his head at Loki as he closed the bathroom door behind himself.

As he walked into his bedroom, ready to go to bed for the night, Thor caught himself thinking about how much he did care about Bruce. In such a short amount of time since they had talked about their feelings together, he seemed to have accepted a whole lot of Bruce into his heart. 

Maybe it was years in the waiting, maybe fate. But Thor knew he cared about him more than he cared about anyone else alive on the earth right now. So even if he was upset that Bruce had left without saying goodbye, or giving him a kiss, he forced himself to understand it was his fault. And he sent a text, hoping to make amends.

 

<Bruce. I care about you so much. Loki had to stay tonight. I have to figure out what to do with him, how I can help. He’s my biological family- the only family I have of that type. I wish you could have stayed longer and I wish we hadn’t had gotten interrupted. I hope to see you again sooner than light can travel. So I can be with my true family. Lovingly, Thor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it's taken so long to update again. I just haven't had undying motivation to write for this. However, I hope this is acceptable. Leave a comment for suggestions, and as always, thanks for reading.

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is my first time I've ever written a fanfic and I think it's going to be pretty long so even if it sucks, hopefully eventually it'll improve. Leave me a comment telling me what your thoughts or what I can improve on- and thanks so much for reading!


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